Rite of Passage

The other day, I feel that I had a rite of passage as a mother.

You know, one of those moments when you go, ‘Oh, so that’s what that is like.’

There are many rites of passage for parents: that first explosive poop at the grocery store that goes right through the infant carrier (check,) the first time your child sleeps through the night unexpectedly and gives you a cardiac episode (check,) and the first time you lose your funny/cool status and become, well… not.

It was a normal weekend morning. The boys had just changed out of their pajamas and were playing. I was chatting with Co-Pilot Dad about us heading out for the afternoon. We started to talk to them about getting ready when he said the phrase ‘the final countdown.’

This of course led me to start singing, The Final Countdown loudly, as I picked up the pajamas on the floor.  I continued sing that same line over and over and twirled the pajamas like pom-poms.

Aside: IS there more than one line to that song? Because honestly, I could not remember any other words. Which, consequently, was why I was repeating “It’s the final countdown!” over and over.

So, really, it was just a typical morning at our house.

And then it happened.

Captain Alpha looked up at me and shook his head.

“Mom, you are so lame and boring.”

His words shocked me – and I burst out laughing.

I began to argue that while there has always been ample evidence of my inherent lame-ness, I would seldom qualify for the ‘boring’ descriptor. (I know my strengths.)

I realized, as he remained unconvinced of my non-boring status, that moment of ‘Oh, so that is what it’s like.’   

I am not silly and funny and cool. (Not anymore.)

I am lame. And, ugh, boring.

He wasn’t laughing at my free-spirited whimsy. He wasn’t joining in and singing and dancing. He wasn’t looking for his own pom-poms.

He was vaguely annoyed. And, had we not been alone at home, I would have embarrassed him.

A rite of passage for both of us, I think.

It was bound to happen eventually, I guess.

In the days since, Captain Alpha has entertained my outbursts with some of his old acceptance and smiles. I haven’t heard accusations of being lame and boring again. But I am pretty sure, like Frosty the Snowman, they will come back again someday.

Have you passed this parenting rite of passage yet? Are you lame and boring, too?

Note: My inner 80s-girl would not rest until I had confirmed that yes, there are more lyrics to The Final Countdown – once I watched this I actually remembered some of them.

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